Open Unto Me...

In between test after test to nail down a diagnosis and treatment with my endocrinolgist, working full-time and being a full-time mom and wife, extended family issues and the general "blahness" that winter brings, I will be the first person to tell you that I have not been the perkiest or most content person so far in 2011.

That changes now.

I have never been overly religious.  I was baptized non-denominational, confirmed Lutheran during a stint where being religious was cool (WWJD bracelets, anyone?) and we were married by a Justice of the Peace.  Blake was born and raised Catholic, though hardly practicing.

Come on, you know you had one...or nine.

We knew that when I was pregnant with Cristian that we wanted to find a church to call our own.  Somewhere where we could raise him that was warm, welcoming and familial.  I did some searching on the Internet and found Tippecanoe Church.  The first thing I read was: "Tippecanoe Church: A Relevant Church for the Unchurched and Dischurched, too!"  Intrigued, I visited with my parents and it was a different experience.  People who I'd never met before hugged me.  I was wished well on my pregnancy.  Instead of wine and wafers there was bread and grape juice.  There was a nursery downstairs and kids time during the service.  I was immediately sold. 

Blake loved the church as much as I did, and we haven't looked back since.  It will be three years in March and we are so thankful to our church family.  They were there when our marriage was struggling.  They were there when there were family troubles.  They have held Cristian in light and he has made some great friends.

Our church is doing GREAT things.  I am so blessed to be part of a great community.  We are giving back to men who need help and showing that there is still good in the world.  If you have some extra funds or are in the Milwaukee area and have some extra time, please give back.

Back to the point of this all...I need to stop thinking of all the negative and focus on the positive.  I may have illnesses, but I am still alive.  I may be busy working, but I have a job.  I have a beautiful son and a wonderful husband.  There may be some family issues, but it has allowed me to know my TRUE family.  Winter isn't fun all of the time, but I have a roof over my head, clothes on my back, and love in my heart.

This all occurred to me at church (and now the entry is brought full circle) when we, in unison, elderly and young, homeless and wealthy, sick and healthy, said the following departing prayer:

Open unto me...light for my darkness.

Open unto me...courage for my fear.

Open unto me...hope for my despair.

Open unto me...peace for my turmoil.

Open unto me...joy for my sorrow.

Open unto me...strength for my weakness.

Open unto me...wisdom of my confusion.

Open unto me...forgiveness for my sins.

Open unto me...tenderness for my toughness.

Open unto me...Thy Self for my self.

Lord God, open unto me!

Amen



Religious or not, these are words we can all use at times.  Just to remember that we are only human and we are still loved.  You don't have to believe in God, but you should believe in something.

Start with yourself.  I'm working on that part for 2011.

<3m

Let the Ball Drop...

Out with the Old and in with the New!  The tree's been trimmed, the cookies have been baked (and eaten) and Santa has made his presence known.

2010 has been a truly wonderful year for me.  My pride and joy is growing into such a unique and wonderful individual.  My family has for the most part stayed healthy and happy.  My husband and I have reunited (and it feels so good!)  I have found a wonderful job with people who truly appreciate me and who I truly appreciate.  I have solidified some great friendships and started the journey to a healthier me.

However, with the end of each year comes many "shoulda, coulda, wouldas" and this year is no different.  Instead of focusing on the bad, I plan on turning them all into positives for 2011.

So, without further adieu, I present to you...

My New Year’s Resolutions:

1. Scrapbook at least one page a month for Cristian and go to at least one crop this year

2. Try not to pay full price for anything—use coupons and sales to my advantage

3. Control my PCOS, hypothyroidism and metabolic syndrome—get healthy and stay healthy

4. Complete some kind of a workout three days a week (i.e. Gazelle, YMCA class, Wii)

5. Participate in Weight Watchers for the entire year and do not let the scale get the best of me

6. Do not put myself down and instead do something out of the ordinary for me (i.e. a Boudoir Photoshoot)

7. Continue going to church at least twice a month and participate in as much as we can

8. Get out of the house once a month to be with some friends so I do not lose myself

9. Have at least one dozen scarves made to donate to the Giving Trees at church and daycare

10. Let patience in and show drama out of my life

11. Make one thoughtful blog post a week and gain some kind of following by hooking up with some of my own favorite blogs (Fatshion Chic, eatmovewrite, ohAmanda, BudgetSavvyDiva and MoneySavingMom, to name a few).

Thanks to you, my few faithful readers, for a great beginning to this blog.  Let's keep it up in 2011.  Let me know you are reading this and leave me a comment!

So from our house...

...to yours

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

<3m

Changes and Labels...

As you may or may not have noticed, I have changed the name.  I am no longer "Manda: In Training." 

I have curves.  I like carbs.  No matter what I do, these two things are never going to change.  I'm never going to be a vegan and run marathons.  I need to remember that Torrid is always going to be a store of choice and I will always reach for that second piece of bread.

Embracing who I am, my curves and slight carb obsession, will be a huge part of finding who I am.  I mean, obviously I am Cristian's mom and Blake's wife.  I'm Mark and Mary's daughter.  I am Kyle's older sister and Joe's niece.  I am Claire, Katie, Nadine, Jess, Leigh, Annie, Cathy, Renee, Lisa, Fe and Cassie's (just to name a few) friend.  I am a biller for GSH.  But other than that, who exactly is Mandy?  Behind the mask of labels, what makes me...me?

I know superficial things about myself:

• Polka dots make the world go 'round.
• I could live in flip-flops if they were work-appropriate and I didn't live in snowy Wisconsin.
• I will always stop if I see a sign that says at least 50% off.
• Dolphins are my weakness.
• Ketchup goes with just about anything.

But, other than that, I'm kind of lost.  I don't even know if I'm good at the things I've been labeled.  I need to search deeper and find who I am.  That's my goal for 2011.  Expose myself (not literally) to, well, myself.

Do not get me wrong, many things about this blog are not going to change.  I am still going to post deals and pictures and crafts.  I am still going to rant and rave.  But there are times I am going to go deeper.

And there just might be a carb-infested goodie in my hand while I do so...

Cotton Candy Carbs?  Yes, please!

<3m